Second 'family'

I have always been a family person. When I studied in Amsterdam, I took the three-hour train ride ‘homehome’ almost every single weekend. Back to my parents, brother, two sisters and our dog. Back to my grandparents. Back to my family.
I have also always needed several people’s advice before I could decide something for myself. The advice of my best friends, my older sister, my dad, but mostly of my mom. Maybe I am a bit of a “moederskindje” as we say in Holland, a mama’s girl. It’s really important for me what she thinks and she has always supported me. Well, not when I decided to get a tattoo, I have to say, but when it comes to important things. Things like my maybe little odd choice of studies (Bachelor in “Scandinavian languages and cultures – Swedish” and Master in “Children’s and Young Adult literature”) and my wish to try to build up a life in Sweden. I’m in the middle of that last thing right now.

During the last year of my Bachelor, I studied in Gothenburg in Sweden. It was hard for me to be so far away from my family and friends, to not being able to visit them whenever I wanted to. I actually didn’t go home at all (but some of them visited me instead). Still I had a really good time and I really felt at home there. So during my Master in Tilburg (NL), where I didn’t feel at home at all, I decided I wanted to go back to Sweden as soon as possible. This might have had a liiittle bit to do with the fact that I met this guy exactly during the last weeks I lived in Gothenburg too, but I swear it was not just because of him. So when I finally was done with my master thesis, I started an EVS-project in Falköping, where I work as a volunteer at two historical museums.
I didn’t underestimate it, I knew it was going to be harder than living in a different country as a(n Erasmus) student. Still it is a lot harder when you experience it than when you’re only imagining it. Actually I shouldn’t have anything to complain about. They arranged this perfect little apartment for me, Mösseberg with its outdoor gym, children’s farm and running/hiking trails was on the other side of the road, my colleagues were nice, everybody was really willing to help me… But still I got SO lonely. And I felt so homesick. And especially in the beginning I was so insecure about my Swedish. If it wasn’t for my boyfriend (yes, the one I met in Gothenburg) and his family, I wouldn’t have made it until now. I would have been back home for months already. But my boyfriend kept me company, said I was brave and ‘duktig’ (really often used Swedish word), laughed a little at my accent, but told me he was impressed by my Swedish, made me laugh, made me happy again when I was down and didn’t take me too seriously when I was grumpy. We went out for walks and power trainings at the outdoor gym, watched movies, played computer games, made cross word puzzles, ate good but unhealthy food and regretted it. And we still do all of those things.
And instead of travelling ‘homehome’ almost every weekend, I’m travelling to my boyfriend’s home almost every weekend now. I have been so welcome from the very beginning and they are helping me with so many things! When I was looking for an extra job, his mother found me one. When I lost my apartment, his parents told me I was welcome at their home if I couldn’t find anything in time, they helped me move and his mother even helped me with my search for a new place. When I have questions about official stuff that comes with being a grown up (from another country) in Sweden, his mother is always there for me. I picked my first mushrooms in the woods with them, I experienced my first Swedish Christmas with them and they teach me more about Swedish culture every time.

I am very very grateful for everything they have done for me and I’m really glad I met them. Of course I still miss my real family in Holland a lot, and of course I still ask them for advice, but it gets a lot easier with a second ‘family’ in the country I would like to live in. And with this short story of my life, I would like to thank that family BIG TIME.